People Who Lounge Around Their Homes In Jeans Should Be Exiled
I’ve got a massive college basketball game tonight and I’m nervous as all hell. I’m not on the squad. I’m a washed up 27 year old and yes, I fully understand how sad it is that a college basketball game between my alma mater and it’s rival school is trivial, I simply cannot help it.
I woke up this morning with butterflies in my belly. To counteract the nerves that I have for a game being played between a bunch of 19 and 20 year old kids I went to the gym. I got myself a coffee which only made me more anxious. And after a shower, some avocado toast, and a glass of kombucha I’m sitting here basically staring at the clock on the wall with nothing to do.
Tipoff isn’t until 8:00 p.m. and I’ve already got the outfit on which I’ll be wearing to the bar to watch the game. It’s a solid outfit. A Peter Millar gameday polo, some Levi 501 light washed jeans, and my New Balance 990v4’s. I don’t have the shoes on just yet because I’ve got about 9 hours until the game starts, but I do have my socks on. Suffice it to say I’m ready to rock. I need this game to come on. I’m going to be hammering Bud Lights with good pals and yelling at a television screen for two hours. What a Saturday night.
The reason I bring up this game, my fandom, and my Saturday morning routine is because I don’t usually have jeans on this early in the day on the weekend. I don’t care how worn in a pair of jeans you have are. They’re not THAT comfortable. And as I sit here typing this I’m finding myself constantly adjusting my bathing suit parts on the couch. How do people lounge around the house in jeans?
I’ve had roommates in the past who legitimately don’t own sweatpants. I fucking LOVE sweatpants. I’d wear them to the bar if it wasn’t such a taboo and polarizing fashion statement. I’ve tried lying down on my couch to watch tv with these jeans and this gameday polo on and I want to die. It’s like trying to relax while wearing cardboard.
I know that doesn’t make sense but that’s what it feels like. My first roommate in college wore jeans constantly. We’d be playing COD or just be sitting around the dorm hungover as all hell on a Sunday morning and I’d come out in a t-shirt and sweatpants - he’d roll out of bed, put a pair of jeans on and wear a t-shirt. Who are these jeans-in-the-house purists trying to impress? I’ve severely jumped the gun today.
I’m about ten minutes away from taking this entire outfit on and putting sweats and a t-shirt on, but I also feel like if I take the outfit off it’s somehow sullied and possibly unlucky for me to put back on before the game starts. I’m nervous. I’m uncomfortable. Life is too short to be wearing jeans as leisure wear around the house. Buy yourself a pair of ten dollar costco sweatpants and start living a little. Go Green. Did I mention I’m nervous? I want to puke right now.